Look Away

Discussion in 'Emotional Romantic' started by Wind, Sep 30, 2012.

  1. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    Look Away


    Don't look this way
    For I have been burned in the face.
    Defeat and captured
    Only released by the sound of my breathing.
    From dust till dawn
    I say look away for I no longer wish for you to see me.
    Released the blood from my eyes.
    Look away for I have you placed in my heart
    I wish you not to see me this way.
    Though I be burn ,torn,tattered and fatal wounded
    Shall my breathing keep me sane.
    May you memory keep me warm
    See these words I speak,hear me breathing so shallow.
    Feel the darkness that formed in my eyes
    Since this is my mind I may be released.
    But forever trapped in a maze that brings
    Me up to drag me down.
    Look away for I am burned in the face
    As long as you remember your in my heart,
    And memory I shall be in yours.
    So I shall say look away
    For I am burned tattered and torn inside my mind.
    Just look away
     
    Tags:
  2. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Interesting write. What inspired it?
    I immediately thought of The Phantom of the Opera when reading it. Such a soul, full of song, embarrassed by his defect. What was your inspiration for writing this one Wind?

    Thanks for the sharing.

    J.
     
  3. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    Saul told me about burning and how if your face was damage by it the inside you would still be there in heart in memory but i don't want someone to rememeber me burned from my own disires
     
  4. butchiesmom

    butchiesmom
    Depressed
    JPiC Premium VIP Member Premium VIP
    I found this sad and profound, Wind. I think, in my opinion, it's the best you've posted so far.
    You hide behind the ruined mask of your burned face telling everyone to look away even as you admit you're still the same person you were before the disfigurement. This could cover so much, so many different kinds of disfigurement. Lost hand, legs, feet. I read your words and felt the sadnesses the shame conveyed inside. You say look away but it should be look past the mask to the person you have always been.
    I see a woman in our local grocery store who is covered completely with warts or moles or something. It's hard to look at her without seeing only those growths to see the person inside. I still can't imagine what it's like for her to walk around in public knowing that she would always draw double takes yet she does. That, I believe, is the definition of courage.
    Great write, Wind.
    Gail
     
  5. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Burned from your own desires... Interesting. And probably occurs more often than we'd like to think. Though figuratively I imagine.
    Who is this Saul btw?

    Or rather look beyond the mask that life has given you, to the person beneath that gives breath to the mask...

    Some people don't have a choice unfortunately :(
    And yes - it's certainly one definition of courage! Good post Sis!

    J.
     
  6. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    My words....i find them unimportant since i can no longer him them when i speak nor see them when i write...my burns can't be seen for this mask is so well made it is the face of a child who has lost her will to feel the love from someone who to honest to be forgiven for her sin she must rewrite her own wrong and wear this mask so that the truth of sin the burns on her face aren't even shown
     
  7. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    I think you'll find though that in the writing of poetry there can be healing. There was a time when I didn't have anything EXCEPT for my words. Putting them down on paper in poetic form became my therapy. And I'm quite sure I wouldn't be here today if it hadn't been for this poetic outlet of healing. So - I offer my heartfelt condolensces for your loss. But do keep in mind that the old cliche sometimes holds true: Time heals all wounds. But in the case - let's just say Poetry heals all wounds.

    Indeed your words are important. :hug:

    J.
     
  8. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    He wasn't my loss ,he was my gain.Even if were apart even in death were both in each other heart and minds....i don't really mind that he's gone. you can't reclaim the dead and your first love will become of youthful memories
     
  9. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Now this is positive thinking! :yes:
     
  10. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    I thought it more as a heart break :( but hey i guess it postive ...i gained so much from him that i don't think i lost him at all....either way...he still gone and dead which makes em even more happy:blush:
     
  11. butchiesmom

    butchiesmom
    Depressed
    JPiC Premium VIP Member Premium VIP
    Honey, my Mom passed away July 31, 2012. It was love when our eyes first met but she was my mommy. I understand the loss of a loved one and can feel your pain. I'm so sorry you had to go through that but your words that it wasn't a loss but a gain was beautiful to me.
    I tend to think that Mamma is sitting at the kitchen table up there bsing with Grandpa and Grandma and playing penny ante. Grandma is laughing at them because she just won the ante. Again.
    Most of us have used our writing to keep us sane when all around us chaos. It reminds us that we are the sane ones not them.
    I'll keep you in my thoughts
    Gail
     
  12. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Well - I was looking at it this way ==> Better a little bit of something, than a lot of nothing but broken-hearted memories holding you down in depression. Because - unfortunately there's no cure for broken-hearted memories holding you down in depression - except for time. Time heals all wounds...?
     
  13. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Ooopsity oops - we posted at the same time. Just wanna say though
    :dito: Cosigned this post!

    J.
     
  14. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    Yes time does heal wounds but only until there open again
     
  15. MsJacquiiC

    MsJacquiiC
    Provocative
    Poetica Magnifique Staff Member
    6,017
    115
    248
    Jun 8, 2006
    Female
    Tennessee
    2
    Interesting thing about the persistence of the human body ==> Scabs to cover the wounds. I suppose we should try not re-opening the same wounds LOL -- hmmm - but then again - there are bandaids :tease:
     
  16. Wind

    Wind
    Confused
    WindXSaul
    188
    19
    18
    Feb 8, 2012
    Female
    Dallas
    0
    Band-aids wash of when you get to close to the tears
     
Draft saved Draft deleted
Loading...
Similar Threads - Away

Share This Page

Loading...